Stop Negotiating With Your Mind

Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash

So, how do you stop negotiating with your own mind?

You won’t like the answer to this, because the answer is: You just stop.

Don’t even allow yourself to start in the first place.

Never forget the following words:

There has never been and there never will be a better negotiator than you when you’re negotiating with yourself.

Because guess what?

The lazy side of you will always win.

You will ALWAYS know exactly what to say to convince yourself to just accept the lazy outcome of the negotiation. After all, it’s so EASY to do so.

From now on, I’m going to use snoozing as an example. After all, there’s no more classical self-negotiation than when you wake up and want to get back to sleep!

When you wake up, your brain knows EXACTLY how to convince you to get back to sleep.

“Oh it’s just 10 more minutes, it doesn’t make a difference”

“What difference are 10 minutes going to make?”

“Are you really going to be late for just 10 minutes? No! So just go back to sleep”,

“Today is Friday, the boss always comes later on Fridays, so you can stay in bed!”


Never snooze.

If you didn’t CONSCIOUSLY decide you could snooze, then do not snooze your alarm clock.

The key to not negotiating with your mind is that you always remember the decision you made while FULLY CONSCIOUS.

That’s what matters. That’s what you need to focus on.

You need to think “When I was fully conscious, I decided I needed to wake up at 8 AM. So today I’m going to wake up and get up at 8 AM. NOT 9 AM and NOT 10 AM”

This is how you stop negotiating with your mind. You stay focused on what matters. Not on your feelings.

You need to LOSE the habit of self-negotiation. Nothing good comes from it. Yet, everyone has this habit!

It’s so important to stay strong and remember what it is that you actually want.

You see, your subconscious only cares about instant gratification, the short term.

It’s up to your conscious side to really make it see the importance of things in the long term. So if your conscious self is the one that understands the importance of the long term and of consequences, then guess what?

Whenever you become aware of the fact that you’re self-negotiating, stop yourself from doing it and think “What did I decide when I was conscious?” “What did I decide when I had no feelings or emotions attached to this decision?”

Whatever the answer to that question is, THAT is what you need to do.

You must never indulge in self-negotiation because you will ALWAYS lose.

You just need to get a new habit of blocking the self-negotiation noise. Call yourself out on your bullshit and DO WHAT MUST BE DONE.

Whenever you say to yourself “It’s just 10 minutes”, you need to follow that up with “No. That’s bullshit. It makes all the difference because it’s the first win of the day. And I want that first win of the day every single day!”

You need to develop the mindset that if you decide something while in a conscious state, you have made a commitment to yourself.

If you love yourself, if you have a true high-quality relationship with yourself, guess what?

You’re not EVER going to break that commitment.

That’s what people who respect themselves do: they don’t break commitments they have made with themselves.

If you make a commitment with yourself, that should be your number one MOST IMPORTANT commitment. PERIOD.

That’s how you need to start looking at yourself. Raise your standards for yourself.

Raise yourself to a NEW and HIGHER level.

If you develop the mindset of actually following through with your own promises, that’s all you need.

Never allow yourself to disappoint yourself!

Next time you notice you‘re self-negotiating, stop yourself right then and there and think “What did I consciously decide?”

Once you have that answer, you just EXECUTE. Don’t even think about anything else.


Never stop hustling & never stop dreaming,

- Dez

P.S. I’m a Life & Business Coach and I’d be happy to help you develop this mindset if you think you could use some help! You can check out my official website for more information

(P.P.S. You can book a 100% free call with me!)



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