How To Stay Single And Happy — 10 Easy Simple Ways

Photo by Verena Yunita Yapi on Unsplash. Learn to enjoy being on your own — it can be incredibly peaceful.

Why should you follow tips on how to stay single?

That’s easy to answer: You see, the best relationships come when you’re not looking for one. Of course, if you don’t believe you’re attractive, you’re probably thinking out loud “oh, that’s just what attractive people say”. But this isn’t only applicable to those of us who are more genetically gifted. Let me explain.

We are all biologically programmed to seek… let’s call it “companionship”. That is why if we’re lonely for too long our standards begin to drop and just about anybody will do for the said “companionship”. But that’s for the weak-willed. You need to have a strong mindset and believe in yourself and your own qualities. You don’t deserve “the best”, you deserve exactly the right person for you. The closest possible thing to “the perfect match”.

The reason the best relationships come when you’re not looking for one is quite simple. If you enjoy being on your own, then it would take quite the special someone to make you change your mind, right? Doesn’t that make a lot of sense?

If you’re desperate, anyone will do. This means you will choose the wrong person that won’t ever be able to make you happy. But if you choose from a position of happiness, then you’re choosing exactly the right person for you. You’ll end up choosing the person you can’t get enough of.

But by enjoying a lone life, I don’t mean you shouldn’t try to meet new people. Especially if you’re an adult male, amazing women won’t start flocking to you just because you decided to enjoy being on your own. What I’m saying is, whenever you meet someone, assume they’re not good enough for you. But still, give them a fair chance to show you who they are.

The best possible relationship is the one between two people who CANNOT get enough of each other. It’s very close to real addiction. And they feel that way because they know they are unique to each other. They’ve both been in the dating market and they KNOW they’ve found somebody special. And that will make them cherish what they feel that much more.

Also, make sure you don’t try too hard when meeting someone new. Just let it flow, if it doesn’t — call it quits. We waste too much time thinking about our fears. What the other could do or say, where you could fail, what could happen if this or that … and so on. Just experience the moment.

There is no guarantee that someone will be in love with you.

No matter how many possibilities, techniques, books, flirting courses or coaching, there is no guarantee that you will succeed and that everyone you like will like you back.

All you can do is truly be okay while single. There is power to that because you’ll start to make better decisions for yourself.

So, now let’s go over 10 ways that will ensure you accept being alone is a good thing. Not only that, but these are also 10 ways that will make you avoid ending up in a relationship with the wrong someone:

1 — Stop wasting time on social media

Nowadays, social media is like a sex marketplace, where you can do some window shopping and, if you’re a girl, you even get a bunch of messages daily. Focus on yourself and in real life.

Besides, it’s a place where male neediness is showcased on a scale. This in turn deregulates that same marketplace. Women are nowhere near as desperate as some men, so social media ends up making it seem that men have too much demand, and women decide the supply. Usually, in real-life markets, the supply follows the demand. But in this case, there’s too much demand so it’s the supply who makes the rules.

Meeting someone in real life will always feel more natural and even-sided. Besides, meeting someone with a context behind always increases the odds of love.

2 — Stop following people you will never have a chance to even meet

Sometimes the reason we’re so needy is that we constantly see many different incredibly attractive people half-naked. Obviously, that’s going to turn you on and will make you seek someone. Guess what? You’ll very likely be disappointed by that someone because you keep seeing (fake) ”perfection” online.

Women, for example, are getting more and more demanding with the men that they choose as their partner. And it makes sense — They have more choice than ever. But the reason behind their higher standards is exactly social media. They can look at all the incredibly successful men out there and decide that’s what they want. It all makes sense, but it makes it impossible for a regular guy to get a high-quality woman.

And for men this is also happening. That regular guy thinks he should get himself a girl at least as amazing as Scarlett Johansson, which simply doesn’t make any sense. This is making both genders have greater expectations of who their partner should be, rather than simply trying to get to know people until they find someone they can connect with on a deeper level.

3 — Don’t hate the other gender

Currently, our society seems more divided than ever. You look at the United States for example and never before has it been so divided. The political parties have more and more people with extreme values, extreme feminism has created a war between men and women, and the fact everyone always has their mind online just made it so people speak less and less to those who live near them. We’re getting out of touch with ourselves and with reality.

Deep down, we’re all human beings who were given the gift of life and are trying to cherish it. We need to be more understanding with each other. Everyone should be treated as equals, but gender differences should be respected. Don’t misinterpret me here. I’m saying men and women ARE different because that’s a fact. But we’re all humans and should all be treated equally.

I’m tired of hearing about toxic masculinity and destructive feminism. Let’s all just get along and judge those who hate instead of love.

4Be aware of your “weaknesses” and focus on improving them for yourself

Nobody knows ourselves better than us, which is why it’s so easy to beat ourselves down. After all, we’re more aware of all of our flaws than anyone else.

Stop thinking about the reasons why you suck and improve yourself. Don’t improve yourself because you want someone, do it out of self-love.

Think about it. If your best friend had a small character flaw and you could help them out, wouldn’t you? I’m sure you would. So, how can you not help yourself out?

Time to get down and dirty and think of ways you can become a better you.

Besides, if you do find yourself in a relationship, focusing on why you suck will make the other person lose interest. They too will start thinking you suck because you’ve told them so many times.

The first girlfriend I ever had talked about how much she hated her body (especially her legs) all the time. We only dated for 1 year and in the beginning I was SUPER attracted to her. In the end? Not so much. I had just spent an entire year hearing about how much she “sucked”. Of course my subconscious picked up on it after a while and my opinion started changing.

Negativity is like a dangerous drug — stay away from it at all times. Do not indulge.

5 — Plan for your own self. Anyone who wants to join should just be a bonus to your life.

The truth is, we’re in 2020. Everywhere I look I see our generations becoming more and more disconnected. It’s perfectly possible that you’ll fall in love with someone for 10 years and then they will just dip out of the relationship with barely any explanation, almost out of nowhere.

We’re all out for ourselves and loyalty is just a word and not a value anymore. The only thing most people value is themselves, which makes this a world in which it is really easy to get hurt.

But you can only get truly hurt if you make your life about someone else. You must adapt. Your life should only be about YOU. Someone wants to join and they’re awesome? Well, that’s cool. They’re free to join and add to it. Just don’t forget that person can change at any time and you need to be okay with that. You’re living YOUR life. Only you are forced to live your life. Nobody else has to be in it. We need to stop being so entitled and taking people for granted.

6 — Learn how to say “no”

Only hang out with people you want to hang out with. Too many times people find themselves in social situations they do not want to be in.

Speaking for myself, I used to always be down to hang out with most people. I’m an introvert, so I learned the hard way that was the wrong thing to do. I said yes because I didn’t want to be anti-social and end up without any friends.

However, the truth is you’re much better off on your own than surrounded by 10 people you do NOT care about. That’s just a strange way we find to not be sincere with ourselves.

Sometimes you’ll end up with a very small group of friends because you have quality standards for yourself.

7 — Learn how to enjoy being alone

The art of being alone is very hard to master in a way that will make you enjoy it. But when you do, it gives you power.

When the only person in the world you rely on is yourself, guess what? You have an advantage over 99% of everyone else.

No matter who it is, most people rely on someone else. Whether that be their parents, brothers or maybe just a really close friend.

Don’t get me wrong. If you have someone supportive in your life, by all means accept their support and support them back. That is insanely valuable and you shouldn’t waste it. But don’t take the need for support into your dating life. Keep it out of there.

Love yourself first. It’s a cliché, but many clichés are so for a reason.

8 — Don’t settle

Seriously, this is what everyone is doing wrong. Learn to have standards for yourself.

Sometimes being single is hard because everywhere you look, you see seemingly happy couples (ESPECIALLY on social media).

You need to realize that what might appear to you, is probably different to them. People everywhere jump from relationship to relationship without even taking a break to get to know themselves. This leads to a myriad of couples who should never have been together in the first place.

The worst part of all is that if you’re with the wrong person, that person is also mismatched. And you both might miss out on the opportunity to meet someone perfect for you, just because you’re wasting each other’s time.

Life is precious. Spend it with someone you can’t get enough of. Sometimes, that someone will be yourself.

9 — Keep your options open

The best way to make sure you don’t end up with the wrong person is making sure you realize you have other options, not just the one.

I don’t mean you have to have 1000 other options (as I said before, that’s not so good). I’m saying that loneliness and neediness cannot be a factor when you’re picking a romantic partner for yourself, otherwise you will make the wrong decision.

If you’re surrounded by a few potential partners, you’ll probably pick the best one. If you only see one potential partner, you might end up fooling yourself that they’re the right one, when they’re the only one.

The key here is balance. You don’t need thousands of options, just a few.

10 — Know why you want to be with someone

Have you ever thought about it like that? Why do you need someone else? What are you looking for specifically for your life? What can you offer others? Heck, what do you WANT to offer others?

If you know exactly what you want and why you want it, you’ll end up with the right person for you. But you must also make sure you’re the right person for them, or you’ll still end up getting hurt.

If you don’t understand yourself, you can’t plan ahead. That’s why most of us end up with people full of red flags. We just haven’t defined the right criteria for our relationships yet.

As we wrap this up, I’ll give you a bonus tip: learn your emotions.

By that I mean, not only learn to control them but, more importantly, also learn to truly understand them. Some people just try to control their emotions without understanding them and then they are shocked when it doesn’t work — their emotions took control of their decisions and things didn’t go as expected.

If you’re a woman and you understand why your emotions get riled up when you meet the typical “bad boy”, then you won’t fall head over heels over the first one that talks to you. You’ll wait until you find a decent enough “bad boy” to fall for. If you’re a guy, you’ll understand that most of the time you’re just horny and don’t want to go home to “take care” of yourself.

I promise you this — if you truly understand yourself with all of your flaws and strengths, it will be much easier to become happier. There’s a worldwide pandemic going on, this just might be the perfect chance to get to know yourself on a much deeper level.

I hope I was able to help someone with this article. Please give me a clap if you enjoyed reading. I’ll see you guys next time.

Don’t forget — stay single until the right person comes along.

— Pedro S.

(Note: below are affiliate links to offers. If you purchase any of the offers I may receive a commission)

P.S: Ladies, if you want to keep your man hooked, “His Secret Obsession” has helped thousands of women improve their relationships. Click here to watch an explanatory video about it.

P.P.S: I don’t condone chasing after exes. But if you feel your ex really was the right person for you and you regret losing them, you can learn more about “The Ex Factor” here.

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I’m a Life Consultant writing about topics that help people around the world with mindset struggles. You can learn more about me here: https://myupself.com/

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I’m a Life Consultant writing about topics that help people around the world with mindset struggles. You can learn more about me here: https://myupself.com/

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